everyone has a dark side, can u love mine?

i know this died i think a year ago? but I'm just occupied. its not meant to be read i guess, not anymore. i write for me so don't keep ur hopes up bout updates.

so after a year and 3 months, i guess its over. I'm still in denial. i keep thinking ur gonna come back n give me another chance but some part of me says this is what i need, to be alone and figure things out.  confused? these days i just try not to think, cos i cant help but hurt when i do. numb doesn't even begin to describe how i feel. being in constant morphine.. bottling it all up is pretty much how it is. of cos withdrawal from the world is an obvious, but i don't have space to be alone, so constantly keeping it together with a big smile plastered on my face when everyone ask how r u is a must. no i haven't told anyone else than the bff, not even my sisters.

the first week is suppose to be the worst, now i don't know if i have hit the worse yet, prob not if im questioning myself. how did Tuesday turned so abruptly . just waiting for him to think this thru i guess. Tuesdays used to be my fav day, now its ntg more than a reminder of what I've loss

Tuesday morning-Michelle branch
pls don't drive me home tonight,cos i don't want to feel alone,
Tuesday morning in the dark, i was finding out who i was.

falling... falling... anticipating the the moment where she will hit the concrete floor in which gravity has been pulling her to, she shuts her eyes close, wanting to slip away before she feels the pain. any pain.

blinking more than twice, not a scratch and in the middle of a meadow she stood, a jungle on her left with a creek on the side. not too distant a faint but distinct laughter she hears, children laughter mingled with shrieks of excitement. she follows, caution with every step treading on soft decayed leafs that form the ground, a blanket that covers her footsteps. as she approaches, she could see a bird mimicking the the exact same sound of laughter that she heard. she knew that she was alone, that there would be no children laughter or songs because around her stood the remains of her village once her home filled with joy and warmth. Now nothing stands but debris of her village, with no one to haunt her but only her memory...